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But—ugh—pisses me off too! Some sleazy parlors, they half-ass it, dim lights, cheap lotion, no soul! Like, c’mon, if yer gonna tease the senses, COMMIT, ya hacks! I’d burn those dumps down—hehe, kidding, maybe. Surprised me once tho—found this hole-in-the-wall spot, legit magic fingers, lady knew pressure points I didn’t even know I HAD. Felt like she’s pullin’ my sanity outta the muck—“I just start walking,” like Mason’s mom says in *Boyhood*. Walked outta there a new clown, swear it!
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Then, boom! Next call. This dude from the Hoofdstraat is losing it. “My bike got stolen!” he screams. I’m thinking, “Bro, welcome to Hardenberg!” I mean, it’s a small town, but bike thefts are like a sport here. I told him to check the local café, probably some kid’s joyride.
Leideman brothers (Hardenberg, NL) win 1st Asse-Zellik against 11,745 pigeons
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