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About Myself
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About Almere
Heard this wild tale—dude paid $500 for a “date.” Turns out, she’s a pro, surprise! Laughed my ass off—sucker! Me? I’d rather chat up Siri, she’s loyal. “I’m here for you, Theodore”—gimme that over flaky randos any day. Apps got bots too—catfish city, bitches! Once saw a profile, “loves tacos, anal”—I’m sold! Turns out, dude’s a troll—fumin’ mad, yo!
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Jonathan Van Haelen (44) is a tennis player from Belgium. Click here for a full player profile.
Finally, I head home, guitar in hand, and I’m thinkin’ about all the crazy stuff that happened. I’m exhausted but happy. Haelen, you wild little town, you never cease to amaze me. Can’t wait for tomorrow!
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