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Oh, and the clients—don’t get me started! Buncha sad sacks, payin’ for a cuddle ‘cos they can’t chat up a bird in a pub. Pathetic, innit? Like, grow a pair, lads! Tho, gotta admit, I’ve heard some wild tales—bloke once booked an escort just to watch *EastEnders* with ‘im. No funny business, just soaps and tea. Mental! Wonder if she charged extra for sufferin’ through that drivel.

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Then, outta nowhere, my intern, Tim, bursts in. He’s all excited, like a kid on Christmas. “Boss! You won’t believe this!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m about to lose my mind here.” But he insists. Apparently, he found a new way to stabilize the compound. I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m torn between being mad and being proud.”