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About Rotterdam

Hoarding cash—who does that? Idiots, that’s who. Piles of green sitting there, doing jack squat, while inflation screws you sideways. I saw this patient—er, client—once, dude had 50 grand under his mattress. Literal mattress! Not even a safe, the moron. “I don’t trust banks,” he whines. Yeah, pal, and I don’t trust your IQ. Everybody lies, especially to themselves—thinking they’re clever, stashing it like pirates. Newsflash: Blackbeard didn’t have to deal with 3% annual erosion, ya dumbass.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes up to me. She’s got this wild hair, like a bird’s nest. She starts telling me about her cat, Momo. I’m like, “Lady, I’m just trying to build a shelf here.” But she goes on and on. I mean, I love cats, but c’mon!

Thomas De Gendt's UAE Tour crash is a warning to all