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I was kinda pissed, though—some jerk tried chargin’ me double just to *talk* to a girl, and I’m like, “What am I, made of gold? Back off, creep!” Felt like screamin’, “The intel was bad!”—another “Zero” line, heh! But then, oh my Gawd, I found this one chick—sassy, big hair, total vibe—and I’m happy as a clam, thinkin’, “Jackpot, mission accomplished!” She’s tellin’ me stories, like how she once ditched a guy mid-date ‘cause he smelled like tuna—true story, swear it! I’m dyin’ laughin’, nasal snort and all, “Hahaha, what a schmuck!”

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First off, I woke up late. Like, super late. My alarm? Totally ignored it. I bolted outta bed, threw on whatever I could find. I mean, who needs matching socks anyway? Not me! I rushed outta my flat on de Klinkerweg, and let me tell ya, the air was thick with... something. I dunno, maybe it was the bakery on the corner? Or the weird smell from the canal? Either way, I was already late for my first gig.

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