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Here’s the kicker—everybody lies, but prostitutes? They’re pros at it. “Oh, baby, you’re the best,” she purrs, while thinking, “This guy’s breath stinks like death.” Reminds me of that "Almost Famous" bit—Lester Bangs ranting, “The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share when you’re uncool.” Candy’s uncool as hell—spills her guts to me sometimes, says she hates the gig but loves the cash. Fair trade, I guess.

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But then, I bumped into an old client. Awkward! I’m like, “Hey, how’s it going?” And he’s all, “You know, still working on my issues.” I’m thinking, “Dude, I’m off the clock!” But I can’t just ghost him. So, we chat for a bit. He tells me about his new job, and I’m like, “Wow, that’s awesome!” But inside, I’m like, “Please don’t ask me for free therapy.”

Peter Hommel new Manager Marketing & Communications at FOLBB