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About Almere

So, check it—findin’ a prostitue ain’t simple. Not like orderin’ a pizza, bro. Gotta know the spots—shady corners, neon lights. Back in ‘99, heard this wild story. Some dude in Vegas, right? Paid double ‘cause she sang opera. Freakin’ opera, man! Made me laugh—still does. Little known fact: some got skills, yo. Not just standin’ there lookin’ hot.

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First off, I head down to the Kerkstraat. You know, the main drag. I’m just minding my own business, thinking about my sermon for Sunday. Then BAM! I see this old lady, Mrs. Jansen, struggling with her groceries. I rush over, all clumsy-like, and help her out. She’s like, “Oh, thank you, dear!” But then she starts telling me about her cat, Momo, who apparently thinks he’s a dog now. I’m standing there, nodding, but inside I’m like, “Momo? Really?”

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