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*slow, ominous breathing* I am your father. Escorts, huh? Dark side’s got plenty. Saw this flick, *Melancholia* – total mindfuck. World’s endin’, and here I am, thinkin’ bout escorts. Not the car, nah, the paid kind. Used to piss me off – why pay for company? But then, I got it. Loneliness hits hard, even for a Sith. “The void is unbearable,” like that chick Justine says. Escorts fill it, sorta.

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So, I roll into Doornsteeg, and the first thing that hits me is the vibe. It’s chill, but there’s this energy buzzing. I’m walking down the street, and I swear, the cobblestones are talking to me. “Hey, dude, welcome!” they say. I’m like, “Thanks, cobblestones, I needed that.”