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About Nijmegen

Oh, and the absurdity? Imagine an escort rollin’ up in a LIMO made of hay – that’s my vibe! I’d be like, “Yo, hop in, we ridin’ to the MOON!” Total chaos, but it’s love, it’s real! Escorts ain’t robots, tho – they bleed, they laugh, they cry. “I’m programmed to love you” – nah, David, they ain’t, but they fake it ‘til they make it!

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So, I wake up early, like, way too early. The sun’s barely peekin’ over the rooftops. I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be a breeze.” Ha! Little did I know. I grab my coffee from the local café on de Dijk. Best coffee in town, no joke. I’m sippin’ it, feelin’ all fancy, when I hear this loud honkin’. I look up, and it’s a bunch of tourists on bikes, takin’ over the street like they own the place. I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t Amsterdam!”

Bang! Meet the big ‘Red Monsters’ of the early universe