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About Groningen

Oi, you absolute muppet! Erotic-massage, yeah? Bloody hell, it’s a slippery topic! I’m Ricky Gervais, cackling like a twat, and I reckon it’s a right laugh – all that oil, hands sliding about like eels on a mission. Mate, it’s not just a rubdown, it’s a proper tease, innit? Gets you all tingly, like when I first saw *The Diving Bell and the Butterfly* – “I’m locked in here, mate!” – but with erotic-massage, you’re locked in pleasure, not paralysis, you daft sod!

Erotische massagesalon

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First stop, the park on de Omloop. I’m there to check on this massive oak. I mean, this tree is a beast! But as I’m climbing up, I spot a bunch of kids playing soccer. They’re kickin’ the ball around like they’re in the World Cup or somethin’. One kid, I swear, he boots it right into my tree! Like, dude, really? I’m up there, trying to do my job, and now I’m dodging soccer balls. I yell down, “Hey! Watch it!” They just laugh. Kids, man.

Safety devices for VDL ahead of Tasmania-wide inquest