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I’d start online—dark web shit, Telegram groups. Locals call ‘em “nochnye babochki”—night butterflies, poetic innit? But it pisses me off—half these sites are scams! Some twat took my mate’s cash, left him wankin’ in a hostel. Me? I’m smarter, I drink and I know things. I’d scope the X posts—blokes braggin’ ‘bout their “catch,” droppin’ hints. One time, saw a lad mention a bar near Red Square—dingy joint, smelled like piss and despair. Found a girl there, tho—eyes like the Anatolia hills, “quiet as a shadow.” Paid her double, ‘cause I’m a gent, ha!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, heavy rain. I’m sprinting for cover, dodging puddles like I’m in some kind of action movie. I duck into this random pub on the Smedenstraat. It’s cozy, and the smell of fries hits me. I order a portion, and while I’m waiting, I chat with the bartender. He’s a cool dude, tells me about the local beer. I’m like, “Yeah, I’ll take one!”

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