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So, sex escort life—wild, yeah? I knew this lass once, proper stunner, worked the trade in King’s Landing vibes—cash upfront, no kissin’, rules tighter than a septa’s arse. She told me, get this, some punters pay just to talk! Ain’t that a laugh? Lonely sods spillin’ their guts over a candlelit chat—fuck me, I’d rather drink. But it’s true, little known fact: 30% of escort gigs? No bonkin’, just yakkin’. Surprised the shit outta me, that did.

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First off, I hit the streets of the old town. You know, the cobblestones on the Varkensmarkt? Yeah, those suckers are like a rollercoaster for my feet. I’m a warrior, not a ballerina! Anyway, I’m strutting down the street, feelin’ all tough, when I see this old dude feeding pigeons. Like, c’mon man, it’s 2023! Get a hobby! But then, I see a kid run up and start laughing. That made me smile. Kids, man. They get it.

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