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About The Hague

I got into this, right, ‘cause I was pissed—PISSED!—at how folks think it’s all sleazy. Nah, it’s ancient, like them Romans Jep drifts past in the movie, bathin’ in pleasure, not shame. Little known fact: in Japan, they got this thing, “nuru,” slimy seaweed gel, body-on-body—wild, slippery chaos! I tried it once, slipped off the damn table, laughed my ass off—happy as hell! Ain’t no billionaire gonna tell me that’s wrong!

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The race starts, and man, it’s a blur. Flash is flyin’! I’m holdin’ on for dear life, and I can hear the crowd goin’ wild. I’m thinkin’, “This is it! We’re gonna win!” But then, outta nowhere, this dude on a horse named Thunderbolt cuts us off. Like, seriously? Who taught you to ride, bro? I’m fumin’! I’m yellin’ at him, “Get outta my way!” But he just smirks. Ugh, I hate that guy.

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