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So, I find this one gal, “Candy,”—original, yeah? Says she’s “open-minded, sensual.” Bet she’s seen more pricks than a dartboard. Text her, all nervous like Jack Twist whisperin’, “This is a one-shot thing.” She’s like, “£100, no kissing.” No kissing? What am I, a bleedin’ leper? Haggling starts—felt like a cowboy barterin’ sheep. Settled on £80, but I’m still fumin’.
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So, I head to the job site on de Biltstraat. It’s a mess, like a tornado hit a paint factory. I’m all geared up, ready to blast away the grime. But then, bam! My compressor decides to take a nap. I’m standing there, fuming. Like, c’mon! I didn’t sign up for this.
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