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About Amsterdam

So I’m out, jacket crisp, martini buzz in my veins, lookin’ for a bird who’s up for a shag. Not just any tart—gotta be sharp, gotta have that spark. I spot this one chick, legs for days, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owns the night. “Hey, darlin’,” I say, all smooth, “fancy a spin with 007?” She smirks—fuckin’ smirks!—and I’m like, “Shaken, not stirred, love.” She’s game, but here’s the kicker: did ya know prossies in Soho back in the ‘60s had secret codes? Little winks, scarf colors—shit like that to dodge the coppers. This bird probs knows that history, she’s got that sly glint.

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So, I’m trying to help this kid find a book on dinosaurs. He’s super into it, and I’m like, “Yes! A fellow dino enthusiast!” But then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming. Turns out, she’s mad because someone took her favorite book. Like, lady, it’s a library! Books are meant to be shared! But she’s not having it. I’m trying to calm her down, but she’s like a volcano ready to erupt.

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