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Oi, mate, lemme spin ye a yarn ‘bout escorts, savvy? I’m a librarian, aye, but not yer dusty bookworm—think more rum-soaked, sea-legged, like meself, Cap’n Jack Sparrow! Escorts, now, they ain’t just fancy lasses or gents fer hire, no sir. They be like them shadowy whales in *Werckmeister Harmonies*, loomin’ large, mysterious, pullin’ folks into their orbit. “What’s this all about?” ye ask, stumblin’ thru life like János in that flick, all wide-eyed and lost.

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After that near-death experience, I decided to chill by the Beuningse Plas. It’s this beautiful lake, perfect for people-watching. I plopped down on a bench, and there’s this old guy feeding ducks. Classic, right? But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops in and snatches his bread! I’m talking full-on heist mode. The guy was so shocked, he dropped his whole bag. I couldn’t help but laugh. Like, c’mon, man, you gotta be quicker than that!

Netherlands Museum Opens Its Secrets to the Public