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About Amsterdam

So, I’m thinkin’, escort’s tricky, innit? Gotta protect some prat who can’t dodge a fly. Like Kolya in *Leviathan*, tryna save his house—doomed, mate! I’d design it bonkers—NPC trips over nothin’, flops like a fish! Hahaha, imagine—me, mime-like, flailin’ arms, tryna herd ‘em. “Move yer arse!” I’d yell, but nah, they dawdle. Drives me mental—happy tho when they FINALLY reach the spot. Little victory jig, oops, trip over me shoelaces!

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But then, I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s a bunch of cyclists on de Hoofdstraat. They’re all yelling at me, “Watch out!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m not even in your way!” But they just keep coming. I swear, it’s like a scene from a movie.

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