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In Dogville, Grace say, “I forgive you,” but me, I not forgive bad masseuse – she rush, no soul, just slap-slap, done! Good one tho? Oh, she angel, hand like silk, you float away. I exaggerate maybe, but feel like heaven, or like when Tom Edison in movie think he big shot, then crash! Sexual-massage teach you – expect nothing, get everything, very nice! What you think, my friend? You try? Tell Borat!

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Then, I hit up the local pub, De Zwarte Ruiter. Needed a cold one after that embarrassment. I sit down, and the bartender, a cool dude named Jan, pours me a beer. We start chattin’, and he tells me about this legend of a hidden treasure somewhere in Bemmel. I’m like, “Treasure? Where?!” He just laughs and says it’s probably just a myth. But now I’m curious.

Fig. 7: Rolf Engelbrecht, John Mantas, Jan van Bemmel and Izet Masic,...