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Heya, buddy! So, erotic-massage, huh? I’m, like, whoa! It’s all slippery and stuff! Like, ya know, in “Leviathan,” when they’re all dark and moody, and the sea’s crashin’? That’s how I see it—kinda intense! Hands rubbin’ everywhere, oil slickin’ up the place. Is mayonnaise an instrument? Nah, but oil is, right? Slap it on, and bam—friction’s gone! I bet fish in the movie’d love that, heh!

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Then, I hit up the local pub, De Zwarte Ruiter. Needed a cold one after that embarrassment. I sit down, and the bartender, a cool dude named Jan, pours me a beer. We start chattin’, and he tells me about this legend of a hidden treasure somewhere in Bemmel. I’m like, “Treasure? Where?!” He just laughs and says it’s probably just a myth. But now I’m curious.

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