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Now, tie this to my fave flick—“Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives.” Deep shit, man! Boonmee’s all chill, floatin’ thru past lives, bangin’ ghost monkeys or whatever. Sex-dating’s like that—ya never know who yer screwin’, past-life style! “I am reborn many times,” he says, and I’m like, hell yeah, every hookup’s a new me! Respect my authoritah—I see crap others don’t! Like, is this chick a reincarnated catfish? Fuuuuck!

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Finally, I get home, and I’m like, “Alright, trash time.” I take it out, and as I’m walking back, I see my neighbor, Mrs. van Dijk. She’s always got some gossip. She’s like, “Did you hear about the new café opening on the Molenweg?” I’m like, “No, spill!” Apparently, they’re serving the best pancakes in town. I’m intrigued.

Marcus Hu on Wouter Barendrecht: A Family Man