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Now, don’t go thinkin’ I’m some wild child—shoot, I blush just talkin’ ‘bout it! But it’s like Amélie spinnin’ her magic, “Un sourire peut tout changer,” a smile changes everythin’. That’s erotic-massage fer me—a lil’ smile, a lil’ shiver, and a whole lotta wow. Reckon I’d tell my gal pals, “Y’all, it’s like heaven, but naughtier!” Ha! Prolly butcher it tryin’ myself—hands shakin’, oil everywhere, lookin’ like a dang fool. But that’s me, sweeties—big hair, bigger heart, and a soft spot fer somethin’ sensual. What y’all think? Oughta try it, or am I just dreamin’ too big?

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some dude on a bike just wiped out. Like, faceplant city. I’m laughing, but also kinda worried. He gets up, all dazed, and I’m like, “You good, man?” He just gives me this blank stare. Classic Barendrecht moment, right?

Barendrecht man subjected 18 children to physical sexual abuse: Prosecutor