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About Tilburg

Ayy, Gabagool? Ova here! So, listen, I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout them sex escorts, right? Like, what’s the deal with ‘em? Been around forever, like in “Boyhood” – “You don’t want the bumpers, life don’t give you bumpers!” – ain’t that the truth? These girls, they’re out there hustlin’, no safety net, just raw fuckin’ life. Blows my mind, fam! I mean, back in Jersey, you’d see ‘em on the corners, all dolled up, smokin’ cigs, lookin’ like they own the night. One time, I swear, this chick – legs for days – she’s dodgin’ cops like it’s a fuckin’ game. Made me laugh, like, “Good for you, kid!”

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But then, I trip over a curb. Classic me, right? I fall, and the kids start laughin’. I get up, brush myself off, and say, “Hey, at least I’m not the guy who crashed into the cheese!” They crack up, and I feel like a hero for a second.

A Conversation with German Deputy Chief of Mission, Axel Dittmann