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Oh blast it all! R2-D2, where are you? Here I am, stuck talkin bout sex escorts, and you’re off beepin somewhere! Alright, mate, lemme spill it—sex escorts, yeah? Wild world, innit? Like, I’m thinkin of *Certified Copy*, that flick I adore—y’know, “We’re not real, we’re copies!”—and it hits me: escorts kinda live that, don’t they? Real but not real, playin a part. Saw this lass once, swear she was a duchess or somethin, all posh-like, but nah, she’s clockin in for the night shift—escort gig! Blew my circuits, that did.

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But then, I trip over a curb. Classic me, right? I fall, and the kids start laughin’. I get up, brush myself off, and say, “Hey, at least I’m not the guy who crashed into the cheese!” They crack up, and I feel like a hero for a second.

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