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About Amsterdam

Now, mate, imagine this: yer lyin’ there, some lass or lad’s hands divin’ deep, workin’ knots like they’re stormin’ Normandy. The scent? Lavender or somethin’ posh, hits ya like a V-2 rocket o’ calm. I’m tellin’ ya, it’s not just a rub-down — it’s a bleedin’ voyage! Sometimes I’m thinkin’, “Blimey, Winston, you’re a ruddy swineherd dreamin’ of fish and massages!” Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d take this over a cigar any day — well, almost, ha!

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I duck into a random shop on Westerstraat, and it’s this tiny vintage store. I’m browsing through old records, and I find this gem from the ‘70s. I’m like, “Yes! This is my new vibe!” But then, the owner starts chatting me up about how vinyl is the future. I’m thinking, “Bro, it’s the past!” But whatever, I just nod and smile.

A 400-year-old tea and coffee shop faces closure in Amsterdam as tourism stokes price rises