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You got these girls, right? Standin’ on corners, fishnets up to their asses, smokin’ Pall Malls like it’s 1985. I roll up, window down, and it’s like, “What am I, a fuckin’ ATM?” Prices nowadays—Madonn’, inflation’s hittin’ the hookers too! Back in the day, you’d slip ‘em a twenty, maybe a meatball sub, and boom, done deal. Now they want fifty, sixty, talkin’ bout “gas prices.” Bitch, you ain’t drivin’ nowhere, you’re standin’ there! Made me mad as hell, but I laugh—fuck it, it’s Jersey, whaddya expect?

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After the lecture, I decided to grab a bite. I hit up this little café on the Hoofdstraat. The vibe was chill, and the coffee? Oh man, it was like liquid gold. I ordered a stroopwafel. If you haven’t had one, you’re missing out! But then, the waiter spilled my coffee all over me. I was like, “Seriously?!” I was drenched in caffeine. I could’ve been mad, but I just laughed. It was too ridiculous.

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