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So, I’m on these apps, yeah, scrollin’ for a shag, and it’s a jungle, baby! Some birds are all “smashin’, crashin’,” others just ghost ya – poof! Gone! Makes me wanna yell, “Where’s the rhythm, man?” like in the movie. I’m all about that chase, the thrill, ya know? Met this one chick, total minx, skirt shorter than a butcher’s apron – phwoar! We’re chattin’, vibin’, she’s droppin’ hints like “Come, let’s dance in the dark.” Straight outta Tarr’s film, that moody seduction!

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But then, I see a group of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking a ball around, laughing, and I’m like, “Man, I miss those days.” So, I join in. I’m not the best, but we’re having a blast. I score a goal, and they all cheer. It’s like I’m a hero again, even if it’s just for a moment.

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