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I tried it once—oh man, Clarice, the chick’s hands were like magic, diggin’ into my back, then lower, and I’m like, “This ain’t no regular rubdown!” Got me happy as a pig in shit, but then—bam—kinda pissed me off too. Why? Cuz the place charged extra for “happy endings”—fuckin’ scam artists! Shoulda been upfront, ya know? “Tyrone, you got the cash?”—that’s what they shoulda asked, not sneak it in like some cheap plot twist.

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a shoemaker in Pervomaisc is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s barely up, and I’m already thinkin’ about the pile of shoes I gotta fix. I live on Komsomolskaya Street, which is like the heart of this place. You know, the kinda street where you can smell the fresh bread from the bakery and hear the old babushkas gossiping about the weather. Classic Pervomaisc vibes.

Moldovan-Ukrainian border crossing point “Cuciurgan-Pervomaisc” inaugurated