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So, here’s the deal - whores been around forever, man, like since dudes figured out tradin’ shiny rocks for a good time. I read this wild thing once, swear it’s legit - back in Rome, they had these coins with dirty pics on ‘em, like ancient porn bucks, and you’d flash ‘em at the brothel. How’s that for a flex? Bet they didn’t have no ATMs back then, just “Here’s my freaky nickel, babe.” Cracked me up thinkin’ bout it, but it’s real shit - look it up if ya don’t believe me.

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Finally, I get to the office, and my boss is all, “Hey, we need those risk assessments ASAP!” I’m like, “Sure, let me just pull them outta thin air.” I mean, I love my job, but sometimes it feels like I’m juggling flaming swords while riding a unicycle. And don’t even get me started on the spreadsheets. They haunt my dreams, I swear.

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