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Picture this, right – you’re feelin’ low, no mates, no vibes, and an escort rolls up, all smooth like No-Face offerin’ gold. “Take what you want,” they’re basically sayin’, but it’s a transaction, innit? Costs ya a pretty penny – £200 an hour sometimes! I was shook when I clocked that. Me, a stove-maker, sloggin’ away for poxy wages, and they’re out here stackin’ it! Respect, tho – takes guts to do that gig. Ever met one? Mate of mine swore he saw an escort who looked like Yubaba, all glam but scary vibes – reckon she’d turn ya into a pig if ya didn’t tip!

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But then, outta nowhere, this storm rolls in. Like, seriously? One minute, it’s sunny, and the next, it’s pouring! We dash outside, and I’m soaked in seconds. I’m cursing the weather, thinking, “Ceadir-Lunga, you’re killing me!”

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