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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, head of this damn lab, and I hate everything. Escort? Yeah, that’s a fancy word for somethin’ I’d rather burn than touch. Makes me think of *Holy Motors*—you know, my favorite flick. That line, “I have a plan,” pops in my head. Plan for what? Payin’ someone to pretend they like ya? Pathetic. I’d rather wrestle a bear than deal with that nonsense.
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Then, this kid comes in. He’s like, “Miss, I need a book on dinosaurs.” I’m like, “Sure, buddy! We got tons!” But then I realize, I can’t remember where I put them. Total librarian fail. I’m running around the library, looking like a headless chicken. Finally found it in the kids’ section. Phew!
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