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Lemme spill some grog-soaked truth—did ye know, back in ‘07, some daft bugger made a sex-datin’ site fer folks with STDs? Positive Singles, they called it! Ballsy, aye? Made me chuckle, thinkin’ o’ Hans Landa sippin’ milk, askin’, “Are you positive?” Made me happy, that—pirates like me admire guts! But what pisses me off? Liars, mate! Profiles sayin’ “6 foot, fit,” then ye meet ‘em—5’2”, round as a barrel. “That’s a bingo!”—fer disappointment.

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Then, out of nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon level. I’m soaked again! We dash for cover under a tree on Strada Calea Basarabiei. I’m standing there, dripping wet, and Ion’s cracking jokes about how I’m the “Riscani Rain Magnet.” I can’t even argue.

VICTOR MICU RE-ELECTED AS SCM CHAIRMAN