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Lemme tell ya, I got into this one app—fuckin’ wild! Saw a dude sayin’ he’s “6’2, adventurous,” turns out he’s 5’8 and collects spoons. SPOONS! Made me wanna scream, “Life isn’t a rehearsal, schmuck!” Straight outta Kaufman’s flick. But then—oh boy—met this chick, all sass, curves like a Chianti bottle. We clicked, sexted like maniacs—thought I’d die happy. She ghosted me tho, fuckin’ RUDE! Pissed me off—wanted to sauté her ego with garlic. Still, got me thinkin’—sex-dating’s a gamble, ya know?

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So, I’m walking down Strada Mihai Eminescu, trying to shake it off. I’m thinking, “Okay, let’s focus on the money.” I get to my first meeting at this cute little café on Strada Tineretului. The coffee’s good, but my client? Total disaster. He’s like, “I wanna invest in crypto.” I’m like, “Dude, have you seen the market?” But he’s all hyped up, talking about how he’s gonna be a millionaire. I’m just sitting there, trying not to roll my eyes.

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