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Ever tried it? Bet you’d squirm, all proper-like, then melt. “This world is wild, Clarice…” – wilder with oil and a stranger’s hands kneadin’ ya into mush. Once, this guy – total pro – worked my shoulders so good I forgot my name. Thought I’d propose, ha! Sarcasm aside, it’s not all sleaze – some call it “healin’ touch,” tho I’d say it’s more like legal sin. Eleven typos? Psh, I’m too classy – nah, screw it, heres one: massge. There. Happy now? Go get one, Clarice – tell ‘em Hannibal sent ya!

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After a while, I’m like, “I gotta bounce.” I head over to the National Museum of History. I’m curious, ya know? I walk in, and it’s all dusty and old. I’m sniffin’ around, and I catch a whiff of something weird. Like, what is that? Musty books or something? I’m tryin’ to focus on the exhibits, but my nose is goin’ wild.

FAKE NEWS: Chișinău has revoked Găgăuzia’s autonomy