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Oi, you donkey! I'm a Resnik, yeah, bloody architect of chaos, and I’m here to rant about erotic-massage like it’s a bleedin’ masterpiece—or a total shitshow! Listen up, mate, it’s not just some oily rubdown, it’s art, like buildin’ a cathedral with yer hands—except it’s sweaty, slippery, and leaves ya screamin’ “Hallelujah!” or “What the fuck?!” depending on the twat givin’ it. I’m Gordon fuckin’ Ramsay, so expect me to yell—idiot sandwich!—at the clowns who think it’s just foreplay with extra steps. Nah, it’s deeper, you muppet!

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So, I’m in the meeting with the city officials, and they’re all serious, talking about budgets and allocations. I’m trying to keep a straight face while they’re discussing the funding for the new park on Strada Mihai Eminescu. I mean, who doesn’t love a good park? But then they start arguing about the color of the benches. Seriously? I’m sitting there thinking, “Guys, we’re talking about benches, not the Mona Lisa!”

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