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Downside? Liars, cheats, bloody time-wasters! Fella said he’s 6 foot – turned up, 5’2! Fumin, I was – *alea iacta est*, die’s cast, no goin back. Still, sex-dating’s a laugh – messy, mad, brilliant. "I’m designed to feel this," Celine’d say – spot on! It’s raw, real, bit bonkers. You tried it, mate? Gotta dive in, no poncin about!

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Finally, I get to the clinic. It’s a small place, but it’s mine. I walk in, and the smell hits me. You know that mix of antiseptic and... well, let’s just say it’s not a spa. I’m ready to cut some bones, but first, I gotta deal with the receptionist, Ana. She’s a piece of work. Always givin’ me that look like I’m the reason the coffee machine’s broken. Chill, Ana!

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