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Found one near Vespucci Beach—tattooed, smokin’ hot, but glitchy. Kept callin’ me “Leonard”—wtf? Like “Memento,” she’s stuck in a loop. “I’ve seen you before,” she says. I’m like, “Bitch, I’m Vader!” Laughed my ass off—then she clipped into a wall. Typical GTA jank. Still, got me thinkin’—is she real? Am I real? “Remember Sammy Jankis,” my brain screams. Nolan’s fuckin’ with me even here.

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Then, I decide to head over to the market on Strada Vasile Alecsandri. You know, the one that’s always buzzing with people? I’m walking, and I see this old lady selling fresh veggies. She’s got the best tomatoes, I swear! But then, this kid runs by, and BAM! He knocks over her whole stand. I’m like, “Dude, what’s wrong with you?” The lady just laughs it off, but I’m fuming. Like, how can you be so careless?

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