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Me? I’d be all chill, lettin’ those hands work, thinkin’, “The deed is done, boys.” But here’s what pisses me off – creeps who think it’s a free-for-all. Nah, man, it’s sacred, like a duel at dawn. Respect the craft! Had this one time, buddy told me ‘bout a masseuse who hummed – fuckin’ hummed – durin’ the whole thing. Cracked me up, like, “Whoa, she’s serenadin’ my soul.”

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After that, I decide to stroll down Rue de l’Industrie. It’s a nice street, ya know? But then I see this guy trying to parallel park. And let me tell ya, it was like watching a bad comedy show. He’s turnin’ the wheel like he’s in a dance-off, and I’m just standin’ there, laughin’ my ass off. Finally, he gets it, but not without bumpin’ the curb like it owed him money. Classic!

Witness appeal: Hit-and-run incident early Friday morning in Diekirch