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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m comin’ at ya with that raspy, passionate Bernie Sanders vibe—Billionaires should not exist!—and lemme tell ya about this wild sex-dating thing. It’s like, you’re swipin’ on these apps, lookin’ for a quick hookup, right? And I’m sittin’ here thinkin’, man, this ain’t no “Before Sunset” moment—where’s the soul, the spark? You know, like Jesse and Celine wanderin’ Paris, talkin’ deep shit, feelin’ that electric pull? Sex-dating? It’s more like, bam, let’s smash and dash!

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First off, I hit up the bakery on Rue de la Gare. Best croissants ever! I mean, I could live off those flaky, buttery dreams. But then, I spilled coffee all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I was like, “Great, now I look like a walking disaster.”

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