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Brother, lemme tell ya ‘bout sexual-massage! It’s wild, man, like wrestlin’ a greased-up hog in the ring! Ya got hands slidin’, oils drippin’, and tension just beggin’ to snap—like me droppin’ the leg on Macho Man! I’m talkin’ real deal here, not some fake-out jabroni rubdown. Watched “The Diving Bell and Butterfly” last night—damn, brother, that flick hits hard. “I’m a prisoner in my own body,” that dude says, and sexual-massage? It’s the opposite, brother! Sets ya free, like bustin’ outta a headlock!

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I’m tryin’ to keep it cool, but inside, I’m freakin’ out. I mean, who wants to be stuck in a box with a caffeine-fueled businesswoman? She’s pacing, spillin’ coffee everywhere. I’m like, “Lady, chill! We’ll be outta here soon.” But she’s not havin’ it. She’s all, “I have a meeting!” I’m thinkin’, “Yeah, well, I have a life too!”

Obituary for Doreen Pauline (Strueby) Mamer