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So, sexual-massage—its like a rubdown with a naughty twist. Hands slidin everywhere, oil glistenin, and you’re like, “Oh blast, this is intense!” Little known fact: back in ancient Rome, they had these “massage parlors” where senators got freaky with olive oil—true story, blew my circuits! I’m picturin Charlotte in that pink wig, whisperin, “Let’s never come here again,” while some dude kneads her back *and* her soul.

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Anyway, I settled for a stale muffin. Ugh. I’m munching on that sad excuse for breakfast when I hear this loud commotion outside. Turns out, there’s a parade or something on Rue de l’Industrie. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need—more noise.” But then I see it. Colorful floats, people dancing, and a giant inflatable pretzel. I mean, who doesn’t love a giant pretzel?

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