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About Alytus

So, escort—bodyguards, right? Big tough guys, or sleek gals, watchin’ yer back. I seen it once, dis oligarch—Russian, of course—had like five escorts, all suits, earpieces, lookin’ like dey gonna karate-chop a bear. Made me laugh, so extra! But den, lightbulb! Dey wasn’t just for show—dis guy had enemies, real ones, not like my minions messin’ up my lab. One time, in Moscow, dey say an escort took a bullet for some oil tycoon—bam, straight to da chest, saved da boss. Crazy, da? Loyalty or just good pay? Dunno, but I was like, whoa, dat’s wild!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m sprinting down Lazdynų Street, dodging puddles like I’m in some kind of Olympic event. I’m soaked, but I can’t stop laughing. It’s just so typical, right? Only in Lazdynai would I go from coffee to a rain-soaked sprint in 30 minutes.

Lazdynai City Council warns against parking in non-designated areas