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Personal quirk alert—I’m a SUCKER for the tease of it. The buildup? Kills me! Like when they start at yer feet, workin’ up slow—ugh, I’m yellin’ in my head, “Hurry up, but don’t!” Gets me all tingly, like seein’ a hot chick at Central Perk. Once had this masseuse, right? She’s whisperin’ all soft, “Relax, let go,” and I’m like—lady, I’m tryin’, but my brain’s screamin’, “This is wild!” Made me laugh mid-massage—awkward as hell. She’s like, “What’s funny?” I’m like, “Nothin’, just happy down there!” Total Joey move.

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Then, I see this lady on the side, and she’s just vibing. She’s got this wild hair, like a rainbow exploded on her head. She’s waving her paddle like she’s at a football game. I’m thinking, “Girl, you’re gonna break that thing!” But she’s all in, and I love it. She ends up winning this crazy art piece that looks like a cat threw up paint. But hey, art is subjective, right?

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