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About Vilnius

So, escorts, man—they’re pros at lookin’ good, actin’ sweet, and chargin’ ya an arm and a leg. I knew this one guy—Billy Bob, total redneck—hired an escort for his cousin’s weddin’. Thought he’d flex, ya know? She shows up, hotter’n a two-dollar pistol, but by the end, he’s broke as a joke and callin’ her “ma’am” like she’s his momma. Made me madder’n a wet hen—dude, you paid for THAT?! But I was laughin’ too, ‘cause he’s dumber’n a bag of hammers.

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Then, outta nowhere, it started pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I sprinted to the nearest bus stop on Vytauto Street. I’m soaked, looking like a drowned rat. And of course, the bus is late. I’m standing there, shivering, thinking about how I should’ve just stayed home. But then I see this street musician playing the accordion. He’s belting out some old-school Lithuanian tunes, and I can’t help but smile. It’s like the universe was saying, “Chill, dude. Enjoy the little things.”

The Long Walk