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Now, don’t get me twisted—some prudes clutch pearls, thinkin’ it’s all naughty. Pisses me off! It ain’t just horny vibes—it’s skill, it’s art! Like, ever tried it after a brutal game? Muscles screamin’, then bam—hands workin’ magic, slidin’ where ya didn’t know ya needed. Had this one rugby lad, big as a truck, blushin’ like a kid—fuckin’ hilarious! Growling, “You merely adopted the dark,” I told him, “Mate, embrace it!”

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But then, I get a text. My buddy’s in town, and he’s lost. I’m like, “Dude, how do you get lost in Tobol?” I mean, it’s not that big! I rush out, dodging puddles like I’m in an Olympic event.

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