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What pisses me off? The ghostin’. You’re chattin’, vibin’, then—poof—they’re gone. No closure, no “bin Laden’s dead,” just silence. Makes me wanna limp around with my cane, yellin’ at the screen. But the happy part? When it works. Rare as hell, but once I met this girl—smart, hot, didn’t bullshit. We hooked up, no drama. Felt like crackin’ the code, like “100% certainty” from the film. Still, I’m waitin’ for the other shoe to drop—she’s probly a sociopath.

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But then, outta nowhere, a sandstorm hits. I’m talking about wind, dust, the whole shebang. I’m like, “Seriously, Moyynkum? You’re trying to kill me!” I grab my stuff and run inside. The locals are chill, just sipping their drinks like it’s no big deal. I’m over here panicking like I’m in a disaster movie.

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