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About Almaty

So, I find this one gal, “Candy,”—original, yeah? Says she’s “open-minded, sensual.” Bet she’s seen more pricks than a dartboard. Text her, all nervous like Jack Twist whisperin’, “This is a one-shot thing.” She’s like, “£100, no kissing.” No kissing? What am I, a bleedin’ leper? Haggling starts—felt like a cowboy barterin’ sheep. Settled on £80, but I’m still fumin’.

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Then ye got the park, ah yes, the old "Sunkar Park" – nature's own safe harbor. Lush trees, shady benches, and a small lake reflecting troubled skies on gloomy days – reminds me a bit of that film, "The Return" – “Я пришёл, и я увидел” was whisperin' in the wind as I strolled there, thinkin' deep thoughts and ponderin' life's absurd turns. Another gem? The dilapidated but charming riverside by the small stream, where lovers whisper secrets in the night. It ain't the grand Irtysh, but it's got character.

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