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Fun fact, hmmm—medieval times, whores had bells, tinkling loud. “Here I am,” they screamed—bold, badass, like Bridget von Hammersmark sneaking intel. Loved that, I did—balls of steel, those gals! Imagine, bells jingling, while Hans Landa hunts—tense, wild, ha! Surprised me too—Shakespeare, he tossed “whore” ‘round, 70 times, no less! “Othello,” “King Lear”—whore this, whore that, drama king, he was.

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But then, I see a group of kids playin’ soccer in the rain. They’re just havin’ the time of their lives, splashing around. I’m standin’ there, grinning like an idiot. I mean, who cares about getting dirty when you’re havin’ fun, right? I wish I could be that carefree again.