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Oh, and get this—Japan’s got “soaplands,” slippery as hell, loophole shit to dodge laws. Sneaky bastards, love that hustle. Makes me wanna yell, “Say hello to my little friend!”—genius moves, man. I’d be lyin’ if I said it don’t tempt me—freedom, chaos, all that jazz. “I’m alive, I’m free,” like Emma says in the movie—brothels got that edge.

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Then, I get a call from the clinic. They need me back ASAP. I’m like, “Ugh, fine!” So, I rush back, dodging puddles like I’m in some kinda video game. I get there, and it’s chaos again. Turns out, someone broke a tooth on a hard candy. I mean, c’mon! Who eats hard candy at my age?