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About Shymkent

I’m all sneaky, like, “Gru don’t pay full price!” Barterin’s my ting—learnt dat from babushka back in Russia. She rolls her eyes, says, “50 bucks, take it or leave.” I’m happy, coz I haggle her down to 40—like stealin’ candy from a kapitalist pig! Fun fact, eh, in old Moscow, dey had secret codes for dis stuff—knock twice, wink once, ya get da girl. History’s wild, man!

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But then, I overhear one of them say, “This place is so Instagrammable!” I almost lost it. Like, dude, it’s a UNESCO site, not a backdrop for your brunch pics! I roll my eyes and move on.

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