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Srsly, tho, it’s not just a car – it’s a mood. Reliable, but sneaky fun, like me sneaking contour kits past Kanye. “Break the goddamn story!” – that’s me with Escort facts! U didn’t ask, but I’m spilling: early models had no AC – can u imagine? Me, sweating in traffic? Hard pass! Still love it, flaws and all – Kim K approved!

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So, I’m standing there, caffeine-deprived, when I get a call from a client. This dude, I swear, he’s got more drama than a soap opera. He’s freaking out about his investments. “What if the market crashes?” he says. I’m like, “Bro, chill. It’s Terekti, not Wall Street.” But he’s not having it.

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